Best VC-financed late stage pre-IPO deals in Middle East

I owe a debt of gratitude to a brilliant, young, Gen-Z Mademoiselle, whose knowledge of the Silicon Valley ecosystem (and tango!) has helped me source and syndicate some of the best VC financed late stage pre-IPO deals ever seen in the Middle East.

Prose is way too prosaic to express my admiration for her talent and diligence and I do not want to write her a poem in any of my acquired languages since both English and French are colonial/imperialist linguistic assaults on my Khoja soul and my knowledge of Kutchi is less than encyclopedic – in fact, sadly non existent apart from my grandma’s terms of endearment for me like mua/lucha when I was a wee little chokraboy.

So let me express my appreciation for my friend in the lingua franca of Brownistan – Bollywood movie song. In this case, I go back to the first Hindi movie I ever saw as a seven year old – Aradhana.

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I remember this movie very well since I got confused/outraged when I saw the Hero (Kaka) go kissy – kissy with the Aunty (Sharmila Tagore) as I was a fanatical fan of the then Indian cricket captain. So I yelled out “Pataudi ko bolunga”. This was not a good idea since a bunch of young guys in the movie theatre in front of me began clapping and yelling after my intervention and Mom was outraged by her brats latest display of bad manners in a public place.

So while my derriere paid the price with a spanking later that night, I have not forgotten the hit song from the movie, which I now dedicate to my young friend.

“Mere Sapano Ki Raani Kab Aayegi Tu,
pre-IPO rut mastani deal kab layegi tu,
Beeti jaye zindagaani, Udemy IPO kab laayegi tu,
Chali aa, tu chali aa… triple bagger deal leykhe ah”

Matein Khalid is Chief Investment Officer with Asas Capital

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